Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Russian Sleep Experiment Orange Soda


The first time I read this story, I could never forget it. Now I try and shared it with you, welcoming myself back into the blogging world one lie at a time. Just your own mind. It begins now..............................

After Tits.................................................................................................................

Ok now........

Russian researchers in the late 1940's kept five people awake for fifteen days using an experimental gas based stimulant. They were kept in a sealed environment to carefully monitor their oxygen intake so the gas didn't kill them, since it was toxic in high concentrations. This was before closed circuit cameras so they had only microphones and 5 inch thick glass porthole sized windows into the chamber to monitor them. The chamber was stocked with books, cots to sleep on but no bedding, running water and toilet, and enough dried food to last all five for over a month.

The test subjects were political prisoners deemed enemies of the state during world war II.

Everything was fine for the first 5 days, the subjects hardly complained having been promised (falsely) that they would be freed if they submitted to the test and did not sleep for 30 days. Their conversations and activities were monitored and it was noted that they continued to talk about increasingly traumatic incidents in their past, and the general tone of their conversations took on a darker aspect after the 4 day mark.

After five days they started to complain about the circumstances and events that lead them to where they were and started to demonstrate severe paranoia. They stopped talking to each other and began alternately whispering to the microphones and one way mirrored portholes. Oddly they all seemed to think they could win the trust of the experimenters by turning over their comrades, the other subjects in captivity with them. At first the researchers suspected this was an effect of the gas itself...

After nine days the first of them started screaming. He ran the length of the chamber repeatedly yelling at the top of his lungs for 3 hours straight, he continued attempting to scream but was only able to produce occasional squeaks. The researchers postulated that he had physically torn his vocal cords. The most surprising thing about this behavior is how the other captives reacted to it... or rather didn't react to it. They continued whispering to the microphones until the second of the captives started to scream. The 2 non screaming captives took the books apart, smeared page after page with their own feces and pasted them calmly over the glass portholes. The screaming promptly stopped.

So did the whispering to the microphones.

After 3 more days passed. The researchers checked the microphones hourly to make sure they were working, since they thought it impossible that no sound could be coming with 5 people inside. The oxygen consumption in the chamber indicated that all 5 must still be alive. In fact it was the amount of oxygen 5 people would consume at a very heavy level of strenuous exercise. On the morning of the 14th day the researchers did something they said they would not do to get a reaction from the captives, they used the intercom inside the chamber, hoping to provoke any response from the captives they were afraid were either dead or vegetables.

They announced: "We are opening the chamber to test the microphones step away from the doors and lie flat on the floor or you will be shot. Compliance will earn one of you your immediate freedom."

To their surprise they heard a single phrase in a calm voice response: "We no longer want to be freed."

Debate broke out among the researchers and the military forces funding the research. Unable to provoke any more response using the intercom it was finally decided to open the chamber at midnight on the fifteenth day.

The chamber was flushed of the stimulant gas and filled with fresh air and immediately voices from the microphones began to object. 3 different voices began begging, as if pleading for the life of loved ones to turn the gas back on. The chamber was opened and soldiers sent in to retrieve the test subjects. They began to scream louder than ever, and so did the soldiers when they saw what was inside. Four of the five subjects were still alive, although no one could rightly call the state that any of them in 'life.'

The food rations past day 5 had not been so much as touched. There were chunks of meat from the dead test subject's thighs and chest stuffed into the drain in the center of the chamber, blocking the drain and allowing 4 inches of water to accumulate on the floor. Precisely how much of the water on the floor was actually blood was never determined. All four 'surviving' test subjects also had large portions of muscle and skin torn away from their bodies. The destruction of flesh and exposed bone on their finger tips indicated that the wounds were inflicted by hand, not with teeth as the researchers initially thought. Closer examination of the position and angles of the wounds indicated that most if not all of them were self-inflicted.

The abdominal organs below the ribcage of all four test subjects had been removed. While the heart, lungs and diaphragm remained in place, the skin and most of the muscles attached to the ribs had been ripped off, exposing the lungs through the ribcage. All the blood vessels and organs remained intact, they had just been taken out and laid on the floor, fanning out around the eviscerated but still living bodies of the subjects. The digestive tract of all four could be seen to be working, digesting food. It quickly became apparent that what they were digesting was their own flesh that they had ripped off and eaten over the course of days.

Most of the soldiers were Russian special operatives at the facility, but still many refused to return to the chamber to remove the test subjects. They continued to scream to be left in the chamber and alternately begged and demanded that the gas be turned back on, lest they fall asleep...

To everyone's surprise the test subjects put up a fierce fight in the process of being removed from the chamber. One of the Russian soldiers died from having his throat ripped out, another was gravely injured by having his testicles ripped off and an artery in his leg severed by one of the subject's teeth. Another 5 of the soldiers lost their lives if you count ones that committed suicide in the weeks following the incident.

In the struggle one of the four living subjects had his spleen ruptured and he bled out almost immediately. The medical researchers attempted to sedate him but this proved impossible. He was injected with more than ten times the human dose of a morphine derivative and still fought like a cornered animal, breaking the ribs and arm of one doctor. When heart was seen to beat for a full two minutes after he had bled out to the point there was more air in his vascular system than blood. Even after it stopped he continued to scream and flail for another 3 minutes, struggling attack anyone in reach and just repeating the word "MORE" over and over, weaker and weaker, until he finally fell silent.

The surviving three test subjects were heavily restrained and moved to a medical facility, the two with intact vocal cords continuously begging for the gas demanding to be kept awake...

The most injured of the three was taken to the only surgical operating room that the facility had. In the process of preparing the subject to have his organs placed back within his body it was found that he was effectively immune to the sedative they had given him to prepare him for the surgery. He fought furiously against his restraints when the anesthetic gas was brought out to put him under. He managed to tear most of the way through a 4 inch wide leather strap on one wrist, even through the weight of a 200 pound soldier holding that wrist as well. It took only a little more anesthetic than normal to put him under, and the instant his eyelids fluttered and closed, his heart stopped. In the autopsy of the test subject that died on the operating table it was found that his blood had triple the normal level of oxygen. His muscles that were still attached to his skeleton were badly torn and he had broken 9 bones in his struggle to not be subdued. Most of them were from the force his own muscles had exerted on them.

The second survivor had been the first of the group of five to start screaming. His vocal cords destroyed he was unable to beg or object to surgery, and he only reacted by shaking his head violently in disapproval when the anesthetic gas was brought near him. He shook his head yes when someone suggested, reluctantly, they try the surgery without anesthetic, and did not react for the entire 6 hour procedure of replacing his abdominal organs and attempting to cover them with what remained of his skin. The surgeon presiding stated repeatedly that it should be medically possible for the patient to still be alive. One terrified nurse assisting the surgery stated that she had seen the patients mouth curl into a smile several times, whenever his eyes met hers.

When the surgery ended the subject looked at the surgeon and began to wheeze loudly, attempting to talk while struggling. Assuming this must be something of drastic importance the surgeon had a pen and pad fetched so the patient could write his message. It was simple "Keep cutting."

The other two test subjects were given the same surgery, both without anesthetic as well. Although they had to be injected with a paralytic for the duration of the operation. The surgeon found it impossible to perform the operation while the patients laughed continuously. Once paralyzed the subjects could only follow the attending researchers with their eyes. The paralytic cleared their system in an abnormally short period of time and they were soon trying to escape their bonds. The moment they could speak they were again asking for the stimulant gas. The researchers tried asking why they had injured themselves, why they had ripped out their own guts and why they wanted to be given the gas again.

Only one response was given: "I must remain awake."

All three subject's restraints were reinforced and they were placed back into the chamber awaiting determination as to what should be done with them. The researchers, facing the wrath of their military 'benefactors' for having failed the stated goals of their project considered euthanizing the surviving subjects. The commanding officer, an ex-KGB instead saw potential, and wanted to see what would happen if they were put back on the gas. The researchers strongly objected, but were overruled.

In preparation for being sealed in the chamber again the subjects were connected to an EEG monitor and had their restraints padded for long term confinement. To everyone's surprise all three stopped struggling the moment it was let slip that they were going back on the gas. It was obvious that at this point all three were putting up a great struggle to stay awake. One of subjects that could speak was humming loudly and continuously; the mute subject was straining his legs against the leather bonds with all his might, first left, then right, then left again for something to focus on. The remaining subject was holding his head off his pillow and blinking rapidly. Having been the first to be wired for EEG most of the researchers were monitoring his brain waves in surprise. They were normal most of the time but sometimes flat lined inexplicably. It looked as if he were repeatedly suffering brain death, before returning to normal. As they focused on paper scrolling out of the brainwave monitor only one nurse saw his eyes slip shut at the same moment his head hit the pillow. His brainwaves immediately changed to that of deep sleep, then flatlined for the last time as his heart simultaneously stopped.

The only remaining subject that could speak started screaming to be sealed in now. His brainwaves showed the same flatlines as one who had just died from falling asleep. The commander gave the order to seal the chamber with both subjects inside, as well as 3 researchers. One of the named three immediately drew his gun and shot the commander point blank between the eyes, then turned the gun on the mute subject and blew his brains out as well.

He pointed his gun at the remaining subject, still restrained to a bed as the remaining members of the medical and research team fled the room. "I won't be locked in here with these things! Not with you!" he screamed at the man strapped to the table. "WHAT ARE YOU?" he demanded. "I must know!"

The subject smiled.

"Have you forgotten so easily?" The subject asked. "We are you." "We are the madness that lurks within you all, begging to be free at every moment in your deepest animal mind." "We are what you hide from in your beds every night. We are what you sedate into silence and paralysis when you go to the nocturnal haven where we cannot tread."

The researcher paused. Then aimed at the subject's heart and fired.

The EEG flatlined as the subject weakly choked out "so... nearly... free...

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Gamer Chicks Are Hot (And Other Gaming Banter)

             Well maybe aside from rocker chicks as well but if you get a combination then you really can't ask for much more. But lets stick with one topic at a time because TOMORROW I think I will get to rocker chicks then maybe on Monday we make a comparison article together. First thing is first though, onto the subject of our topic and into her native habitat.
             The first thing we will try to take a look into is the REALITY vs FANTASY look of these types of girls. They DO exist which is our first great reality but there is an issue with that. Unless you personally KNOW the girl then you probably only speak to her over a gaming service such as PSN or XBL or TeamSpeak, Keystrokes, Macros, etc etc.



Some basic matters to address:

A) Are you even playing with a real girl
B) Does she have the skill she claims to have
C) Is it really that babe, or the elusive land whale




What We Hope For:





















What really happens most of the time:
Buzz, your girlfriend, WOOF!
Ahh yes, facepalms for everyone.



















Thanks Matt, Thanks Trey
Do you want to see my tits? 5000 gold please.



















                  







To dispel our first issue cited at A) typically I follow this rule of thumb, no one who games is a chick until proven otherwise because they belong in the kitchen and not on a console or PC of course, but we allow for the slim chance of it really being who they say they are.
                  I typically just see some slob who is a windowlicking basement dwelling 40 year old who enjoys ponies, pedobears and a general degenerate that plays in that fantasy world of getting some horny 14 year old with hairy knuckles in the hope of getting some side boob for running a 2 hour quest for "HER" and then somehow someway the magical vixen on the other end of the server will fall in love with them or some stupid shit whatever they think could possibly happen. So the first thing you must do is avoid all forms of contact with these kinds but HOW? Easy Answer. Never trust anyone and insult everyone no matter what.

       Typical banter on a daily basis between me and a few mates, and even a few gaming chicks I hang with (yes they do exist but shut up I'm getting my points across):



Get gaped, faggot.
You completely suck at this, faggot
Suck my tiny French cock, faggot.
You should just turn the game off and kill yourself, faggot.
I donkey punched your mom, faggot.

          

You will notice it's very important to put in question your opponents sexuality with no prior knowledge of their existence in the world until the server got warmed up and started humming.
This is to establish dominance and let whoever is out there know who the man of the room is. It's like love potion number 9 for women, it's like a beacon and you can practically hear the sandwiches being made already.



Quest For Sandwiches

Sandwiches Provided

   Now that the women have started being weeded out from the pansies and from the losers that thought they were tough shit and now are just jerking off with their own tears, let's get down to business. Typically what you should be left with at this point is the alpha gamer chicks, which is where the good ones come out and play and hopefully stay. But there is an important fact you must know and it is absolutely essential you follow the next pieces of etiquette to stay Alpha as Fuck.


    Don't be a wanker and fall all over yourself, and DON'T expect her to magically fall in love or do anything to make yourself look more like an idiot than you already are in reality. Be cool.
    The entire point of this quest was to find the elusive gamer chick and add her to your friends list, NOT to be a fucking romeo, douchebag.
    My personal favorite type of gaming chick is as follows and I personally know about 4 or 5 off the top of my head. They actually all hold some skill even besides just the ability to clean clothes and be in a kitchen. I'll provide 3 quick references to help you keep on track and to build your online harem.




Type A: Most Common & Not Able To Kick My Ass @ Halo
This is the type that most of us will know because our buds already have brought her around to our homes / apartements / lofts / etc. She has a general knowledge of a console or two and maybe even has a few keyboard and mouse games under her belt but most likely has kept her collection to the basics of Mario, Tetris, Burnout and a handful of games on the Wii & Kinect using herself as a controller at times which can be both fun & frustrating. You have to explain what a bumper button is and teach her how to change the input on the tv to get to said gaming console after she turns it on, but she is not ready to take on FPS's.


Type B: Less Common & Typically Most Fun To Game With
 This is where things start to get interesting with this type. She notices the difference between the console graphics and can tell you where the secret passages in Doom are and knows the Konami code. She knows how to sync up the controller and even has a few games of her own and possibly even a console at her place & yours. You can go questing with her or you can start a campaign and you still will generally take point because you've done this before, but you know that when it comes down to it, she can rescue you with a health pack and not let you bleed out alone & afraid.



Type C: The Most Dangerous & Insane
 This is the most dangerous type known to man. She can active reload and knows every corner of a race and knows how to boost off the line and which weapon will get the most effective Kill:Death ratio. She is one of us, and that is dangerous. Not only will she be on the console when you got home from the bar with your mates, she will challenge you AND win to just about any game of your choosing and when you lose she makes YOU bring her a sandwich. I have gamed with this kind a few times before and they take it personal when they noticed you took them out in a race or you corpsehumped her earlier that week. They are great to have on your side but be careful as they are also just as easily psychotic as they are hot. I've seen what happens when girls get into games against each other when they are like this. I have even taken off my mic a few times because the screaming was just too much to bear. The best ones like this stay silent most of the time until the end of the first match. At this point they speak and the entire room explodes when they realize they all lost to a girl.

Fake: Women During This Time Had Smaller Tits, FACT.


        I have seen some shit and done some things, but keeping to my guns their are gaming girls out there, but I digress because they are still small in numbers in the first place.
        I'd say out of 100% only about 30% even game in the first place, as most girls hate video games/ they are stupid/ they don't get it/ won't waste their time, and most commonly in my opinion just plain suck at them, we get frustrated and send them back to the sandwiches and their baby making tasks they are so good at.
       PS: Don't bring your babies to game night if you have one girls, they will end up drunk and cursing off other babies online and possibly be reported for slander.


           So to this I tip my hat to you, the gamer chicks out there, as you are few and far between in the first place and we can always game together as long as my thumbs are still attached and working. Remember though the internet is a rough place for anyone, if you are TYPE C you can take care of yourself and we might get along the best because you will rip into the opponents with me and possibly have a hell of a time laughing at the discontent of all the newbs out there.
          Know this, I will not be calling you up to go out on a date. I will friend zone you because some things are worth much more than casual sex to me, and a gaming partner is up there. The other types also are incredibly fun to hang out with a spend time with, but remember to stay classy and keep the nastyness for the circle of death, the placement on the race line and banter for the microphone. So try to keep it in your pants ladies and contain your orgasms, but look me up online for the following networks:

X-Box/Windows Live: Lepreemo
PSN: Lepreemo
SteamID: unmelnkoly@hotmail.com
Starcraft: Lepreemo@hotmail.com

You know where to find me, no excuses anymore. Let's Game It On.
Until Next Time,
        ~Lepreemo







Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Uncensorship (I Give SOPA the middle finger)

             

            So being that this is a public domain NOT controlled by a giant conglomerate or anything (Google, AdSense) I have the amendment on my side in which I choose to flex my internet muscles a bit with my freedom of speech.

That's correct. Not a single fuck given.
                    Now some people say the internet isn't a very effective way of getting your individual voice heard, which I suppose is true in its own way because in a world of millions of digital voices, ours can get lost in the crowd very quickly and even if we do get a spotlight its not very likely that we will stay there long as internet fame has a very short shelf life before the next bit of insanity gets ejaculated into our eyes and ears. Notice how many fucks I just gave during the time I created pretty much a run-on sentence? But in the same light realize that it's not a HUGE deal but I have people in different COUNTRIES who just see my input and can share it as well as they see fit. AKA I am ALREADY heard around the world even if it is just a few paragraphs of insanity saturated aggression at a time. When was the last time your thoughts were being read by someone in Italy, Canada, US and UK all in one day? That's what I thought.

                   One of my biggest internet woes though is my lack of ability to pay for my asian prostitute prob.. er.. business expenses because I have not been funded yet by the millions of internet dollars out there. Trust me it's there as well, but being YouTube & Google had it out for me at one point due to a simple mistake I have been banned from using their AdSense and lost about $40 in real money thanks to my friends who follow me & new viewers/subscribers/followers every day. What is it they are trying to keep me from? Oh maybe they just need to ensure they have enough in their pockets so their grandkids families don't have to work at all because when it comes down to it; Would you even bother going to school if you were a multi-millionaire? Didn't think so.


It's ok to be a thief if you are cute enough.
 



                   SOPA has nothing to do with my personal conquest though, they are trying to keep people like you and myself, who are ultimately the nobodies, from sharing with each other without even the THOUGHT of making money off of each other. Now how fucked up is that? SOPA in case you were not aware of is the "Stop Online Piracy Act". In simple terms, they want to shut down all the free and open source programs which helps keep the internet being awesome. Why is this bad? Don't be stupid, you know damn right that copy of Nickelback you took from your girlfriends little brother should NOT be retailed at a price like $15.99, give or take a few bucks. Now a few of you are going "aww don't pick on Nickelback, they are just trying to make it too." Yea well F off Nickelback you all suck and don't deserve a record contract. The other arguement is you are STEALING from the artists, which for the most part is also completely false. Music was always free as I've seen it, you are paying for the packaging and greed. Now I myself dream one day to just make my living strumming away on my guitar and creating music, but I don't need to be a millionaire; Hell I'll take being a thousandaire.

               Point being almost EVERY band who has made it big makes their shitload of money from TOURING, not from CD sales, because that's when they sell  you a $40 t-shirt that fades after 3 washes but you are happy as fuck to pay for it during the time being so you can remember the show.

Elvis Costello Laughs At Piracy Warning  "Not even a 14yr old would be scared of that"


Joss Stone: Piracy Is Great A musician who realizes Music is free, it's the business that's fucked up.

Bender's "Anti-Piracy" Ad   Matt G. gets in on the giggles.
As I said I'm not trying to stir the pot with musicians, but moreso the marketing company and post production teams, NOT THE ACTUAL WORKERS, but the fat cats who are already lined to the brim in their pockets with blow and aids vaccinations meanwhile we the real people lose our jobs, homes, cars, etc. all to the conglomerates of this fucking country while we starve; So we share among ourselves quietly from Peer2Peer networks, such as my personal choice when it comes to sharing, uTorrent. There are also a number of sites like TORRENTZ.EU and the never dying  

thepiratebay.org who is RIGHT NOW posting THIS EXACT PHOTO for their home page.
This kind of looks like I'm not alone in this arguement anymore.
 I have another method as well for my primary download function, but it's a well kept secret somewhere at the end of the internet.


             Now I limit myself to software. Development teams and companies have a multitude of people to a small group of programmers, depending upon situation, for their individual software and I feel they truly do deserve something for their time and effort, but in all fairness, why the fuck should I pay $750 for a console and then have to spend on average $40-$80 PER game and THEN have to pay for the online service provider (X-box Live, I'm looking at you) and other games which make you pay month to month at another cost of $10-$20/month. They fine a college kid $375,000 for sharing 30 songs but they let a murderer walk free if he has a good enough lawyer and enough fame. What the fuck is going on here?



              Now I know I'm not covering all bases. I've left out the $40M/movie stars and $250K/episode stars, but that's because I don't have to and a bunch of you trollolers out there will bitch and complain some way and try and tell me I'm a moron and a thief, but you know what? A beautiful thing about the internet is the ability to just NOT READ IT THEN. Worst case scenario you actually DO get into an internet based debate or fight, what's the worst thing you are going to do, CAPS LOCK ME TO DEATH?? 

              I guess all I am really getting at is the only people who give much of a shit about this, are the money hungry grubs that don't have enough. Did you know that Simon douchebag makes over $167,000,000 a year. A FUCKING YEAR. ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY SEVEN FUCKING MILLION AMERICAN DOLLARS by his annoying ability to insult people and seem like hes so fan-fucking-tastic. I've never even heard of that douchebag before that crappy Idol show, and I don't care if you have either, hes a NOBODY. Then the mobs come and say, if he's such a nobody then why is he so rich? Because he knew another fucking nobody that gave him a break and now you people keep feeding him more and more by watching that trash. Only good thing I've EVER seen with that bag of vinegar douche involved with is when an  

ACCIDENT happened.

               












Personally I will probably never being rich and/or famous and I'm ok with that.

I play my music I wrote without censorship and I play with pure passion. 

I play my games with my other broke ass friends that I share the pirated games and apps with and we all have fun.

I watch my movies on Netflix or ones I download because I'm not going to be fed the crap you try and put in front of me on tv, but there ARE good shows on if you can find them.(Fuck Yea Forensic Files, Go Die Jersey Shore. I am also from Ocean County NJ, we are not like those people. None of them even live here.)

I have the freedom to post WHATEVER I want on here, within reason. (I only say within reason because Child Pornography is illegal in the country, and I agree 100% because that's just wrong, rage on Pedobears and people who's name rhymes with Bitch Comer and Kelly Barsley)
This is not a child.

And neither is this..





















I choose not to seed my torrents (because that is my right) and SOPA can never take my rights.


I'm not telling you to agree with me.
I'm not telling you to share this with your friends or family.
I'm not telling you that it's all going to be alright.
I'm not telling you the lies the rest of them do.

I am telling you to think for yourself.
I am telling you to take a stand for your own beliefs.
I am telling you that no matter what they lose, they can't take what you are.
I am telling you to not let them dull your senses and dilute your mind.
 I am telling you it's better to be hated for who you are, than loved for what you are not.
     (I stole that last one from a dead guy, Kurt Cobain, maybe you've heard of him)

~Lepreemo

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Ahoy There Old Video Game Junkie! (I'm Your New Best Friend)

Hey anyone like old video games? for like, free? What about if it was all the old DosBox games available? No config needed. Some guy named D-Fend (I'm still skeptical if that is his real name btw) has created a Utopia for the 80's and 90's kids like us. So let's take this one step at a time because you are slow in the head.

                          Click ME ASSBUTT!!< See that?
DejaVu

 Nostalgia FTW. Download it assclown.



You extract it to where you want games installed in its own directory.

Open it then stupid. Hit the (+) add button.

Click download packages. Still with me moron? Good for you. 

Now scroll through the games and check the box of the one you want. 
Holy fucking asscrackers? Do you see what I see? FUCK YEA YOU DO!

Hit download & Install. I know that was tough jellybuns but you are almost there because this next part is really tough. 


Wait and do nothing as it downloads... Wow. Now when you are done stupid all you have to do is simply wait for the download screen to close. Because, MOTHA FUCKIN MAGIC HAPPENS! All you need to do is close your download window and there is something on the main screen you wont FUCKIN BELIEVE!


Now take your nubby little fingers around your mouse and move the cursor over the "RUN" button. I know, take your time.

THERE IT IS JUST LIKE HE SAID!!!
I don't crop things.
Because you shouldn't need this in the first place, Stupid.

Congratulations genius, you're an idiot. Now get out of my face and don't say I never did anything for you.





                            ~Lepreemo

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Testing HTML (Not My Real Post For The Day)

Your Ad Here

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Video Games (Best And Coolest Way To Not Get Laid)

              I personally do not give a damn, I will die playing my games because people come and go. Your family members are going to die, your girlfriend (boyfriend in rare cases) will leave you because of your addiction; You will fail out of school and possibly lose your job but you know who will always be there? 
 Video God Damn Games.
                 



                In my own world I have grown up with these little bits of electronic joy because think about it, what do you always fall back to when the going gets tough. Stuck in a boring lecture about when Einstein buttfucked some relativity into our life? Or how about 1 if by land and 2 if by sea or some shit like that? What about that ever so ball-rattling lesson of photosynthesis when we were in 5th grade? Whip this bitch out and call it good.


PS; I OWN GB printer still, don't make me prove it.


                             




So yea you got through your adolescence this way, but guess what else came out along the way which kicked major ass? FUCKIN A RIGHT! MULTIPLAYER! KICK EVERYONES' ASS! Now you didn't have to be alone on your quests for glory because of that 2nd controller or that system link option. I don't know about you but anyone else in here X-Link KAI back in the day to spoof an IP connection to XBL so I could play Halo with my homies and hump the shit out of them upon their demise. In the case you are not quite sure what a "corpsehump" is I have included this example both visually and .... (what's a clever word for reading.... readily?? wtf why not?) available for you. BTW this is also very much so referred to as Tea Bagging. Typically it's supposed to be when you are getting some dome from a pretty girl but let's be honest, you aren't getting any of that here.                                

                                 Then as the years passed by I became even more savvy with how to get my game on ranging from servers through emulator programs with hundreds of roms that we can effortlessly play now on our phones, computers, and gaming consoles with the proper persuasion. The trick is though, some of even the oldest games still have secrets that we have not found. Like a 26 year old Easter Egg that was unearthed recently in a Donkey Kong game for the Atari. Maybe also how the new Batman Arkham City game was earlier revealed in Arkham Asylum as an "Easter Egg". If I got started on Easter Eggs though we will be here for far, far too long, but just know that some vary from a simple "you found a secret" message to "here have this weapon to blow the balls off your enemy from 3,000 miles away" I personally enjoy the latter of the two, but in this day and age, I am not selfish nor picky.

                       I have a lot more I'd like to say about this subject, so I will, but not today. I am going to come back to this subject constantly over time because there is SO MUCH to discuss about gaming. Yea you probably won't be the most popular with the opposite sex (unless of course you are a girl and then every techno-nerd will be splooging themselves and tripping over their own feet to get to know you or run that pesky quest for you so you don't have to. Perfect examples come from a series known as "THE GUILD" which you should look up sometime as well. I personally KNOW what a female vagina looks and feels like but don't fret, I did not always, and that nerd part of me shall never die most likely. Keep on gaming folks, and remember to keep that save file updating because nothing worse than advancing towards the end of Metroid and forgetting to write down your pass word or advancing in Punch out or FINALLY making it to FRIDAY in paperboy. Good Luck fuckers, you are going to need it, also so you know an upcoming blog will be comparing older games to newer games. Now here is some Metroid codes because I feel like it:

Get EVERYTHING code: NARPAS SWORD0 0000_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ as a password. Note: "_" indicates a space
Status Password
Slightly powered in Brinstar007ltp W20000 025kHa 8A00?Y
Ridley00U--- -u0000 0AFw9Y 1800sb
Ready for Kraid0Gz--- -m3e0G 00VvjS 3m00n?
TourianM7---- --zOA0 2T-tfm a000d5 atop
In suit, end gameuVt-Fg boo-W7 9t?lM0 O00Gsi
No suit, end game, best endingX----- --N?WO dV-Gm9 W01GMI
Play as the girl with all the arsenal weapons mMuiS1 II6-GE Jls?h0 m00WRM
Weird Code; Freeze, Varia, No bombs, odd ending Daniel Daniel Daniel Daniel
Brinstar with 10 missiles, 1 Energy Tank,and Long Wave Beam 018000 020000 04GA00 0000Xg
215 missiles, 5 Energy Tanks, all power-ups, both mini-Bosses defeated X-z-uJ lls0W0
Ready for Mother Brain2m-m?S 7p?20G 00lxYi 3W00nu
At Mother Brain's Lair, most power-ups M7?7pW ?VmGA0 2T-JNm U000cD
Second quest022400 A00000 05?00m 0000aS
Second quest at Ridleya0-AAA AAA820 9HTEYD B990hu
Second quest at Norfair81?KKK KKKG40 IAwTNA KIIGc9
Second quest as Samus without suit0WX002 W00004 1VW0C0 0000MO
All Energy Tanks empty, Wave Beam, no Varia, no bombs, start in Tourian THISPW-ACTUAL-LYDOES-SMTH1n
Unlimited rockets and energy, all power-ups except the Wave beam narpassword0000000000000






Monday, December 26, 2011

This Week Does Not Exist. (Trust Me)

     I was thinking about this yesterday discussing Holiday times and such with a friend Stephanie and it hit me. Aside from the excited feeling of returning that crappy sweater, or the video game EXPANSION your girlfriend got you when you need the original copy of the game first to play, or maybe you just aren't that interested in that gift certificate for 2 weeks free at the B&N book club, there is not a whole lot we like to do so we erase our plans and our minds for the week because EVERYONE wants to celebrate New Years but NO ONE likes this week. Allow me to explain & it will unfold eventually.



Don't know if animation will work, giving it a shot.
             

                So you think ok well it's the 26th, some of us have work, some of us do not. We shall start with the first option. If you have work, not ANY part of you even wants to be there. Not even a little. So you throw your brain into auto-pilot and just get through the day. So you get home, eat some of the left overs, play with your new toys you actually like and call it good for the day.


             




I'll note here, I DO NOT Own Skyrim unlike every other 20something year old
   Now if you are NOT employed here are your options, continue to get drunk off holiday cheer OR keep playing with your new holiday toys waiting for whomever it is that actually has a job to come back around or for your friends to get off work and you can all share tales of Santa and wonderment.
                




              Ok so we've made it now into the 27th, but aww shit, bet you forgot about those crappy gifts you didn't like at all huh? Well it's time to TURN THOSE MOTHA FUCKAS INTO PROFIT, or KICKASS TOYS that you DID want. FUCK YEA!! MAYBE EVEN SOME MOTHA FUCKIN BEER!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZmDWltBziM This link involves singing about beer. Enjoy.

              At this point I think you can see where I'm going. So we either decide to run the gauntlet and return the gifts or send out the appropriate amazon.com return forms and await the magic of turnaround time. But at this point what have we really accomplished here? NOTHING, THAT'S WHAT. Ok so were at the 28th, but by now, you are cranky, because you DO NOT feel like waiting for another Holiday at this point. Trudge through that shit until the 30th and guess what you've done the past 3 days.
              You have either:
A)Planned for a New Years Party the past few days
B)Been drunk and playing with your toys on Holiday Vacation
C)Working and pissed because it's not New Years Yet and you want that extra day off.
  
This year is a special year though because it NYEve will be on a Saturday and NYDay will be on Sunday, and you know what happens on Sunday don't you? FUCK YEA YOU DO..
FOOTBALL!!!
Yes, I really do like the 49'ers. Have for years.

 
So it is with great pleasure and hopefully a very high BAC that I wish you a remainder of this year you won't even remember, to a Football filled New Years. I'll leave you with one last bit of food for thought. When was the last time you even remembered ANYTHING about the week between Christmas & New Years?...
 I'll wait...
Yea...
That's What I Thought.

~Lepreemo



Chitika Loves Me So They Asked Me To Sell You Some Stuff.