Monday, December 26, 2011

This Week Does Not Exist. (Trust Me)

     I was thinking about this yesterday discussing Holiday times and such with a friend Stephanie and it hit me. Aside from the excited feeling of returning that crappy sweater, or the video game EXPANSION your girlfriend got you when you need the original copy of the game first to play, or maybe you just aren't that interested in that gift certificate for 2 weeks free at the B&N book club, there is not a whole lot we like to do so we erase our plans and our minds for the week because EVERYONE wants to celebrate New Years but NO ONE likes this week. Allow me to explain & it will unfold eventually.

Don't know if animation will work, giving it a shot.

                So you think ok well it's the 26th, some of us have work, some of us do not. We shall start with the first option. If you have work, not ANY part of you even wants to be there. Not even a little. So you throw your brain into auto-pilot and just get through the day. So you get home, eat some of the left overs, play with your new toys you actually like and call it good for the day.


I'll note here, I DO NOT Own Skyrim unlike every other 20something year old
   Now if you are NOT employed here are your options, continue to get drunk off holiday cheer OR keep playing with your new holiday toys waiting for whomever it is that actually has a job to come back around or for your friends to get off work and you can all share tales of Santa and wonderment.

              Ok so we've made it now into the 27th, but aww shit, bet you forgot about those crappy gifts you didn't like at all huh? Well it's time to TURN THOSE MOTHA FUCKAS INTO PROFIT, or KICKASS TOYS that you DID want. FUCK YEA!! MAYBE EVEN SOME MOTHA FUCKIN BEER! This link involves singing about beer. Enjoy.

              At this point I think you can see where I'm going. So we either decide to run the gauntlet and return the gifts or send out the appropriate return forms and await the magic of turnaround time. But at this point what have we really accomplished here? NOTHING, THAT'S WHAT. Ok so were at the 28th, but by now, you are cranky, because you DO NOT feel like waiting for another Holiday at this point. Trudge through that shit until the 30th and guess what you've done the past 3 days.
              You have either:
A)Planned for a New Years Party the past few days
B)Been drunk and playing with your toys on Holiday Vacation
C)Working and pissed because it's not New Years Yet and you want that extra day off.
This year is a special year though because it NYEve will be on a Saturday and NYDay will be on Sunday, and you know what happens on Sunday don't you? FUCK YEA YOU DO..
Yes, I really do like the 49'ers. Have for years.

So it is with great pleasure and hopefully a very high BAC that I wish you a remainder of this year you won't even remember, to a Football filled New Years. I'll leave you with one last bit of food for thought. When was the last time you even remembered ANYTHING about the week between Christmas & New Years?...
 I'll wait...
That's What I Thought.


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